{"id":544,"date":"2020-03-13T21:07:40","date_gmt":"2020-03-13T21:07:40","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.goonerholicsforever.com\/?p=544"},"modified":"2020-03-16T07:21:23","modified_gmt":"2020-03-16T07:21:23","slug":"how-are-the-arsenal-squad-dealing-with-corona-virus","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.goonerholicsforever.com\/?p=544","title":{"rendered":"How are the Arsenal squad dealing with corona virus"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
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Image courtesy of Getty Images<\/em> <\/figcaption><\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n

With the news that our leader has been laid low, how are our players dealing with the corona virus? Well each has his own technique \u2026..<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Bernd Leno – tried to catch the virus but couldn\u2019t quite hold on to the little blighters. Eventually decided to punch the bugs, rushed off his line and accidentally punched Richarlison in the face – so the virus isn\u2019t all bad.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Shkodran Mustafi – decided to slide into a crowd of bugs and scythe them all down – mistimed his slide and got infected through every orifice before turning to David Luiz to blame him for his stupidity.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Just at that moment Luiz almost involuntarily threw out an arm and caught a shower of bugs flying from Guendouzi\u2019s billowing hair as he ran late and aimlessly past the hapless centre back.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Kieran Tierney – has been self isolating in the treatment room for over two months and has therefore successfully avoided contamination .<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Hector Bellerin – like Tierney has undergone weeks of treatment room isolation. Has recently returned to action on the pitch but has so far failed to get near enough to any opposition forwards for contamination to be a possibility.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Alexandre Lacazette – despite a number of bugs trying to land on the centre forward, they have all bounced off him and landed at least a very safe four metres away.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Mesut \u00d6zil – has such a clear picture of where all the bugs are, he has appeared to be able to avoid any contact and has successfully made himself invisible to his would be attackers. The virus calls him The Ghost.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Granit Xhaka – simply walked towards a crowd of bugs assembled at the side of the pitch and told them all to \u201cFuck off!\u201d Despite badly aggravating the bugs into a frenzy of activity, it seems they decided to leave him alone and let him play on unaffected.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang – constantly switches position from one side of the pitch to the other, so that the bugs have no idea where to find him.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Reiss Nelson – has only allowed himself to be seen on the pitch for a few minutes at the time. When he does get out there, he appears to either use Mikel Arteta as a shield or runs so fast the bugs can\u2019t catch him.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Any more contributions in the drinks please!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

We know this is serious, but you\u2019ve still got to laugh!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

With the news that our leader has been laid low, how are our players dealing with the corona virus? Well each has his own technique \u2026.. Bernd Leno – tried to catch the virus but couldn\u2019t quite hold on to the little blighters. Eventually decided to punch the bugs, rushed off his line and accidentally […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":15,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[10],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.goonerholicsforever.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/544"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.goonerholicsforever.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.goonerholicsforever.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.goonerholicsforever.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/15"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.goonerholicsforever.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=544"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/www.goonerholicsforever.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/544\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":549,"href":"https:\/\/www.goonerholicsforever.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/544\/revisions\/549"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.goonerholicsforever.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=544"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.goonerholicsforever.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=544"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.goonerholicsforever.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=544"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}