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This view of Bournemouth was provided courtesy of the Bournemouth tourist board. The slogan was provided by someone who has not visited LA.

The Pre-ramble

Hello Gladness, my old friend

This weekend sees The Arsenal taking a short trip to the Dorset coast to face Bournemouth in the hope of not only maintaining our 100% start to the season, but also delivering our first three-game winning run at the start of a season since the 2004/5 campaign. Optimism, both guarded and unbridled, has abounded in the Goonerverse this week as the good news has just kept on coming since the frustrating end to last season. Our new signings are prospering, our failed signings are leaving, our injured are returning, and most importantly our team is winning. Though experience tells us that guarded is the wiser course at this stage, I must admit to a high bar in terms of expectations this season and an almost unseemly yen toward the unbridled. 

And why not really? I believe that many of us, blessed with a certain hard-earned skepticism, are fully aware that Football, being a fickle beast, rarely, but not always, fails to joyfully puncture early season balloons; on the other hand there is certainly a line of thought that hope is there to be enjoyed, not feared as though a slavering politician; therefore, for the fullness of the time allotted, I will continue to savor our early season delights in gleefully raucous “we’re gonna win the league” mode until the inevitable POP heralds the return of those sturdy but tiresome bores Ma and Pa Reality.  

Will that pop come at Bournemouth? Well, anything is possible of course but I very much doubt it for reasons I will explore in more detail later. However, for the moment let’s focus on The Arsenal.  

The Starting XI

Hello Goalness, a welcome trend  

To date, we have ground out a win at Palace and delivered a lesson in attacking to Leicester. Six goals in two games are indeed welcome, nicely on track for the 80-90 goals Mikel requires.

Both Jesus and Martinelli have hit the net running, and even Xhaka is looking dangerous in the good, positive, warm feeling sort of way. Long may it continue.

I have seen the latest injury news update straight from the horse’s mouth as it were, and it was those exceedingly rare but heart-fillingly sweet three little words….. Everybody is ok. 

I would be surprised to see a starting XI any different to the one that has won the first two matches in such contrastingly pleasing styles. Vieira had a run out for the U21s this week, as did ESR, and I assume both will be on the bench this weekend. I did notice that Tomi did not play in that U21 game, though whether that is a sign he will start this week I have no idea. 

The decisions will come left, right and centre for MA as the season goes on – we already have 9 games scheduled for October – but I think that just at this moment he will not change the team. Therefore, at this stage, and entirely predictably, I believe it will be the below XI…….

      Ramsdale

Benjy WS Gabriel Zin

     Party Xhaka

   Saka Ode Gabi

         Jesus

Subs: Turner, Tomi, KT, Rob, Sambi, Mo, ESR, Vieira, Eddie

For the subs my guess is that no place for Pepe, but it may be that MA will want the extra right-wing option for as long as he’s here.

The Opposition

Hello Bournemouth, yet goodbye again

Bournemouth were relegated at the end of the 19/20 season after a 5-season stay in the Premier League. Eddie Howe, once touted as a possible manager of The Arsenal, departed, eventually rolling up in colder climes and the usual large-scale turnaround of players began. We got the best of them as you know. A fairly mediocre season in the championship followed despite the benefit of the parachute payment system (who says the PL owners don’t care about the little clubs?), but a better effort last year saw them win automatic promotion back to the Promised Land Premier League.

They made a good start to the season with a 2-0 home victory over a poorly-managed, under-performing Villa before getting a fairly comprehensive drubbing against a well-managed, corruptly-funded Man City. The new cast of Bournemouth in the Premier League: The Return is, like most sequels, just a shade or two lower in quality than the original and certainly shares the danger of being largely forgotten by all but the most diehard fans. The cast is led by Scott Parker, who I quite liked as a player though he was vastly over-rated. He ran around tackling, was often a bit fouly, and scored the occasional goal (31 in 486 league games), a step or three below top-class he was it seems, unsurprisingly, well-liked at the neighbours as well as at Fulham and West Ham – both of whom he ruthlessly dumped upon their relegation. 

This current Bournemouth side is more or less fashioned in Parker’s own image and, therefore, will I expect be relegated come May, whereupon Scott will, most likely, be off free. Anyway, enough of him, what of the journeyman support cast? Well, they still have a smattering of their previous PL squad. The likes of Kelly, Lerma, Stanislas, Billing and their main attacking threat Solanke remain, but others like Calum Wilson, Harry Wilson, Ake, Fraser, King and the one and only Aaron Ramsdale are gone. Solanke is a fitness doubt, the old “we’ll see how he is on the day routine”, that generally means he will play but regardless this is a team weaker in Goal, Defence and Attack than two years ago.  Perhaps that isn’t a bad thing in some ways as the previous lot got relegated without much of a fight, but, in all honesty, I would be surprised if they are not down by April. Having divested themselves willingly or unwillingly of many PL quality players, Bournemouth have invested little in the replacements they now need and the life of a yo-yo club beckons, pockets too packed with parachute payments to stay down long, but too greedy or incompetent to risk the necessary investments required to stay up. Harsh you may feel, but my sympathies lie with the fans of such clubs, and there are several of them. They do not deserve such leadership. As you may have guessed by now, I am not a fan of the parachute payment, it is unfair to other Championship clubs and encourages a lack of ambition in its recipients. 

The Holic Pound

Hello luckness, be for our men

We have played Bournemouth 12 times since our first meeting, losing one, drawing two, and winning the other nine.  I am sure after reading this review you are not expecting me to suggest anything other than a decent win for The Arsenal this time around too, and you are quite correct. 3-0 to The Arsenal seems a touch conservative but perhaps about right, though the odds are only 8-1 or so.  For the first goal-scorer, I would have gone with Gabriel Jesus, who did in fact score the winner for Man City when he last played against Bournemouth, but I have a feeling it is time for Bukayo Saka to find the net and he so rarely disappoints. 

Or if you feel this new-look Xhaka is here to stay then he is 16-1 for the first goal. 

Well, that is about it for this preview and it remains only for me to wish one and all a safe and happy trip to the ground, their local bar or their favourite rocking-chair. 

COME ON YOU GUNNERS!

43 Drinks to “Can we put the Cherries in the pits? Yes, we can!”

  1. 1
    bt8 says:

    Hey Matt!

  2. 2
    ClockEndRider says:

    Nice report, Matt, delivered with style and panache.
    After the way we have started, I can’t see anything but Arsenal goals. Gabby at the back, Gabbys in attack, Arsenal on the way to Champions League…..

  3. 3
    Countryman100 says:

    Nice preview Matt! I doubt anyone on this blog is going to the game because the ticket allocation is tiny and tickets like hen’s teeth. So Sky Sports for me and, like you, I’m optimistic. City tore them a new one last weekend so hopefully we can do the same. Are you waiting up until 1am for the game (fortified by Kirin beer and Sake) or will you watch in the morning?

  4. 4
    bathgooner says:

    Thanks, Matt, for an excellent preview. I suspect Tomi San was witheld from the fray in midweek as he might be needed to replace Benjamin White but, like you, I expect that the latter will keep his place. I am a great believer in ‘not fixing it if it ain’t broke’. I like the sound of your 3-0 to the good guys and as you observe, it’s time for Bukayo to hit the net.

    A 5.30 kick off is a good time to open a bottle of fine South African Shiraz. 🍷

    COYG

    BMBD (c) LSG

  5. 5
    North Bank Ned says:

    A breezy read, OM, appropriately sea breezy perhaps. You certainly planted a vision in my brain.

    Bournemouth feels like LA? Let me count the number of ways that is wrong…

    I expect Scott Parker to pack his midfield as he tried to do against Man City, and with as little success.

  6. 6
    TTG says:

    A very enjoyable and informative preview OM, thanks
    I’ve been to both Bournemouth and LA several times and definitely prefer Bournemouth. Of the three promoted sides Forest have bought a shiny new squad , Fulham have strengthened considerably and Bournemouth have brought in very few players .
    I do know someone going tomorrow but he is a Bournemouth member . .
    I’m expecting exactly the same starting XI , and the same score as against Palace -2-0 but hopefully we will be spared the anxious second half
    COYG NLF!

  7. 7
    bt8 says:

    Seems appropriate enough for Bournemouth away…

  8. 8
    bt8 says:

    Another excellent preview Matt. Your optimism should also be visible in the players’ attitudes from the off. The Jesus-Saka-Martinelli axis should be too much for them to handle.

  9. 9
    OsakaMatt says:

    Thanks gents, appreciate the comments. I was looking for a picture of Bournemouth for those that might not have been there, and when I saw it I thought that whoever wrote that slogan must be either an even bigger optimist than me or hallucinating

    I will stay up for this one C100, it’s not so late for a Saturday night and refreshments
    are available, though not sake as I won’t make it past half time 😉

  10. 10
    Doctor Faustus says:

    A delightful preview, Matt. Thoughtful too. Thank you!
    3-0 seems very plausible though I haven’t yet seen these new season cherries yet.

    Happy journey to all the traveling gooners!

    Come on Arsenal!

  11. 11
    bathgooner says:

    That’s certainly not one of their best, bt8 @7. For me, that’s a ‘filler track’ you bury in the midst of something more memorable to the audience. I do hope the team at Bournemouth produce a performance of a far, far higher standard than that! Though I expect I’ll get slaughtered by Steve T for my failure to appreciate ‘great art’.

    Perhaps this sentiment is more apt (and appropriate to LA):

  12. 12
    ClockEndRider says:

    Pure genius!

  13. 13
    Trev says:

    Thanks Matt, an enjoyable read and a good analysis of where Bournemouth stand.

    I’m not sure how they would grow that much, to be honest. A tiny ground would need replacing by a mega-rich owner, but would the town ever fill a stadium big enough to ensure genuine premier league ambitions ? Probably not, I’d say.

    But come on lads ! 2-0, 3-0 at measly odds against a depleted Bournemouth ? Where is all the unbridled optimism ? I’m going to stick my neck out and predict a 5-0 away win for by far the greatest team the world has ever seen !

  14. 14
    Noosa Gooner says:

    Thanks Matt
    I’m not getting carried away. A trip to the seaside in olden times usually resulted in too much rock and a sugar hype.
    I’m thinking 1-0 and I’d be happy with that.
    UTA.

  15. 15
    Uplympian says:

    Many thanks OM for a very fine review – it was a really enjoyable read in which you have covered all the bases. Eveything is set up for a nice win – what could possibly go wrong 😉
    If we play like the 1st half of the Palace game and all of the Leicester game the 3-0 is a good call.
    COYRRR

  16. 16
    North Bank Ned says:

    Three points are the thing, so we round out our first set of three games with nine points. Then onto another nine from the next set, Fulham, Villa and the Mancs.

    Your historical matchday trivia: The capacity of Bournemouth’s Vitality Stadium (Dean Court as was) is barely 11,000, 6,000 fewer than the PL’s second-smallest ground, Brentford’s new Community Stadium. Bournemouth does not own its ground, having done a sale and leaseback deal with Islington-based property investment company Structadene in 2005. That arrangement has hindered subsequent efforts to expand the ground.

  17. 17
    bt8 says:

    We might need a spark today if everything doesn’t go swimmingly by the sea shore. Just a feeling but Could Eddie be the man?

  18. 18
    21st century gooner says:

    Expecting a relatively comfortable afternoon/evening for the boys later, you’d expect Bournemouth to be in the bottom 3 come may. For me they’re just one of those clubs who just don’t belong in the prem. I know that sounds very “big six fan entitlement” of me but their ground wouldn’t be out of place in league 2. In fairness I did have a soft spot for them under Eddie Howe, I don’t know much about them these days but having lost several key players in recent years I think they will struggle. To stay in the prem for 5 years for a club of that size was quite an achievement but I don’t think their stay will last anywhere near as long this time around. Especially when you look at how the 2 sides they came up with (Fulham and forest) have strengthened in comparison. They will be this year’s Norwich. We will win 4-0, Jesus brace and a goal apiece for saka and martinelli. 2 assists from Ø. I have seen the script. Hope all the travelling gooners have a pleasant trip by the seaside!

  19. 19
    bt8 says:

    I hope your prediction is spot on 21cg but we must beware complacency knowing Bournemouth will have lay it like a Cup tie. Our side is unchanged but Vieira and ESR on the bench. COYG!!!

  20. 20
    bt8 says:

    Nice goal by Saints at Foxes. 1-2 Adams

  21. 21
    bt8 says:

    @19 have lay = play

    Autocorrect becoming reverse Freudian there.

  22. 22
    North Bank Ned says:

    Unchanged again. Vieira on the bench.

    Ramsdale
    White, Saliba, Gabriel, Zinchenko
    Thomas, Xhaka,
    Saka, Odegaard (c), Martinelli
    Jesus

    Bench: Turner, Tomiyasu, Tierney, Holding, Elneny, Lokonga, Vieira, Smith Rowe, Nketiah

    The entire bench would start for the hosts, I suspect.

  23. 23
    North Bank Ned says:

    21CG@18: Your assessment of Bournemouth is spot on, in my view. Prime candidates to go straight back down. What’s interesting about Forest bringing in a whole new team after winning promotion is that when Fulham tried it the previous time they came up, it backfired. They lost the cohesion that got them promoted in the first place and couldn’t gel the new formation in time. Forest faces the same risk.

  24. 24
    Countryman100 says:

    Note no Pepe. On his way to Nice.

  25. 25
    Gunnersaurus Stunt Double says:

    COYG!

  26. 26
    bathgooner says:

    Focus. Win your individual duels. Keep the tempo up. Find a teammate with every pass.

    Go win Arsenal!

    BMBD (c) LSG

  27. 27
    bathgooner says:

    Come

    On

    You

    Pinkos

  28. 28
    ClockEndRider says:

    Have it!

  29. 29
    ClockEndRider says:

    This could be a massacre

  30. 30
    ClockEndRider says:

    Bournemouth are chasing shadows. How dispiriting must it be?
    Good.

  31. 31
    ClockEndRider says:

    Great new Saliba song!

  32. 32
    Gunnersaurus Stunt Double says:

    More goals please!

    Completely controlling the game. Great performance.

  33. 33
    ClockEndRider says:

    Saliba!

  34. 34
    North Bank Ned says:

    That was a stroll by the sea. Wouldn’t have minded a couple of the late chances going in to boost the goal difference.

    Still nine points from the first set of three games. On to, doing the same with the next three.

  35. 35
    bt8 says:

    say we are top of the league we are top of the league

  36. 36
    Las says:

    Hey Matt, thanks for this awesome preview! It was not just funny but you were absolutely spot on!
    You got the double! I wish you would tell me the lottery numbers next week!
    COYG

  37. 37
    bt8 says:

    Yes, Matt was funny, wrote a great preview and did bring home the correct 3-0 score in the ‘holic pound so a trifecta of sorts but did Saka score first as he predicted? I hate to be picky of course. 😆😆😆

  38. 38
    OsakaMatt says:

    Thanks Las 🙂
    bt8 is correct as I will readily admit and I also sustained an er… slight knock in the pre-game warm-up and missed all the goals due to snoring loudly.
    Never mind, easy win and a goal for Saliba!

  39. 39
    OsakaMatt says:

    Correction: a GREAT goal for Saliba. Good to see Ode getting on the score sheet too. 3 games, 9 goals, 9 points. Happy days.

  40. 40
    bt8 says:

    38 x 3 = 114.

    In case anybody was wondering😎🤫🤞

  41. 41
    bt8 says:

    Even mentioning the above numbers is surely a tip over into the unbridled enthusiasm category for which I voluntarily consign myself to the naughty step. (Emoji of self flagellation to be placed here)

  42. 42
    bt8 says:

    BBC match report seems to have come up with an aptly positive review of Saliba’s goal and overall performance: “Arsenal bided their time before sealing the win but did it in style when the impressive Saliba elegantly found the top corner from the edge of the penalty area.”

  43. 43
    Bathgooner says:

    >>>>>>>