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The treadmill turns again and exactly 100 hours after the final whistle blew on our 5-0 crushing of Nottingham Forest, we kick off again, this time in the Europa League against FC Zürich from Switzerland.

We need only to match whatever PSV Eindhoven achieve in the Arctic Circle against Bodø/Glimt to ensure finishing top of our group. Apart from the prestige and confidence that being group winners might lend us, that feat would also save us two extra games in the new year by avoiding the play off round of qualification into the round of 16. Group winners go straight into the Round of 16 draw while the 8 second placed teams will play off against the 8 teams who finished 3rd in their Champions League groups. There are likely to be some big names dropping down – Tottenham will not be amongst them after a smash and grab 2-1 win in Marseille against the run of play – and whilst it might be true that the bigger they are, the harder they fall, it seems better to avoid some of them at this juncture.

North Bank Ned wrote an excellent history of FC Zürich in his preview of the reverse fixture a month ago so, if that’s what you’re after, I would refer you to his piece in the archives.

So what of the Swiss? In our Europa League group the men from the mountains are rock bottom with no hope of ‘alp or rescue from this last round of fixtures. They sit seven points behind PSV, with a 2-1 home win against Bodø/Glimt their only source of points, and a further two points behind the Arsenal sitting proudly at the summit. In the Swiss Super League things appear no better as they have been on something of a Swiss roll down the table into tenth place, with six draws and seven losses from their thirteen games played so far. It’s to be hoped there will be no way off that slippery slope for them at the Emirates. The Swiss have so far conceded 15 goals in their five group matches, twice conceding 5 against PSV, so there must be a realistic possibility of an avalanche of strikes for us on Thursday night.

It’s usually so cold in the Swiss Alps that a violinist once noticed that he couldn’t keep his violin in tune, so he asked the conductor of his orchestra to help. “Take it to Opporknockety,” said the conductor. “He is a violin expert.” The violinist packed his things and made the trek to the village where the expert lived. Sure enough, Opporknockety fixed the problem and the violin sounded great. A few years later, the violinist noticed that his instrument was once again failing to stay in tune. The violinist said to his conductor, “I guess I’ll have to take it back to Opporknockety.” “No, you can’t, ” said the conductor,” “Opporknockety only tunes once.”

The teams I looked through the whole Zürich squad list and have to admit that I didn’t recognise a single name. I can’t find any news regarding injuries and suspensions for the Swiss team and, frankly, it would make no difference to me if I could.

On the other hand there is quite a bit of news concerning our own players. Mo Elneny has reportedly posted on Instagram that he is back in training and “ready to fight”. Oleksandr Zinchenko could also make a return – it’s hard to imagine a softer game for him to test his fitness and he is reportedly back in full training. Maybe Mikel Arteta could minimise the risk to those two by giving them 45 minutes each. Someone is going to have to fill the gap left by the absence of our Mr. Everpresent, Granit Xhaka, who will be serving a one match ban following his yellow card against PSV last week.

There doesn’t seem to be any solid information on Marquinhos, in which case Gabriel Martinelli may have to continue – a pity with Chelsea coming up on Sunday lunchtime. It seems unlikely that the manager would risk Gabriel Jesus but on the other hand – there’s always another hand in football management – a couple of nice easy goals would do his confidence the world of good. Reissue Nelson looks bound to continue after a fine performance on Sunday and will look to carry on slaloming his way past the defenders on our right wing. Matt Turner is given a chance of returning too, following his groin injury.

Bonus news for Gooners today is that Bakayo Saka suffered only bruising to his foot and ankle, and is already back in training.

And so my stab at a stronger line-up than would have been ideal right now is –

Turner

Tomiyasu — Holding — Gabriel — Tierney

Vieira — Lakonga — Zinchenko

Nelson — Nketiah — Martinelli

Subs most likely to be used – Elneny, Jesus, Marquinhos (if fit), Cedric (if it’s comfortable)

The Holic Pound

The odds are unsurprisingly heavily stacked in our favour for this game – typically at around 4/23 or 1/6 on an Arsenal win, around 43/5 or 9/1 against a draw, and 20/1 against a Zürich victory.

Kick off is on Thursday 3rd November at 20.00hrs UK time. Coverage on BT Sport.

28 Drinks to “Five Star Arsenal Take On Rösti Looking Swiss”

  1. 1
    Gunnersaurus Stunt Double says:

    Lovely stuff Trev! Packed full of gags, as ever (Reissue Nelson is great!) whilst also teeing us up nicely for a match that requires our full attention until the final whistle, when we will, almost instantly, be looking ahead to Sunday.

    As for tomorrow… we should win. We need to win. So, go and win, lads!

  2. 2
    TTG says:

    Sunny and enjoyable preview on a bit of a wild night here Trev.
    I’ve completely failed to schedule this game in my calendar so I’m due to be taking curry and Cobras tomorrow night . I’m confident we will win well and after ten minutes will have played more attractive attacking football than the Spuds did in the whole of their game last night . They really don’t do first halves do they ?
    I think Elneny is more likely to start than Zinchenko and Turner isn’t fit so we will start Ramsdale . I expect us to win 3-0

  3. 3
    North Bank Ned says:

    As puntastic as ever, Trev. Opperknockty! It’s the way you tell ’em…

    As GSD says, let’s get the business none with no scares or alarms.

  4. 4
    OsakaMatt says:

    Thanks Trev! Highly readable as ever, and very enjoyable with my morning coffee.
    No idea on the line up but it’s a game we really should win with whatever squad
    MA selects. A second successive solid thumping would be good for morale.
    5-0

  5. 5
    OsakaMatt says:

    Read this from Tim at Arseblog about Tomi at left-back and thought it was an interesting take

    Kieran Tierney left-back?

  6. 6
    bt8 says:

    Opporknockety knocks! 🤣

    Great preview, Trev. Even without our Swiss talisman Mr. X we should be able to scale whatever heights must be scaled. COYG

  7. 7
    Doctor Faustus says:

    Excellent preview Trev! The gentle humour of the piece juxtaposed with a mortally dangerous pun. 🙂

    I have a feeling we will see Albert Sambi Impatient Lokonga in the Xhaka role tomorrow, TP5 making a rare Europa start in the deep, and Vieira for Ødegaard. Oleksandr Zinchenko may come in from the bench in the later part of the second half to get some minutes, and if everything goes well may start against Chelsea. Mo Elneny to give Partey rest in the later part of the game.
    It could also be Vieira for Saka, Reiss on the left for Gabi, and Ødegaard starting.

    All we need to do is win and then we don’t need to care about the result in other match. Such clarity of purpose should also be invigorating. 🙂

    Come on Arsenal!

  8. 8
    North Bank Ned says:

    Your Zurich injury news: Kosovan international left winger Donis Avdijaj, fellow Kosovan international centre back Mirland Kryeziu, veteran Swiss international midfielder Blerim Dzemaili and Swiss U-20 DM Miguel Reichmuth are all gone in the fetlock. The first three all played in the first leg in Switzerland.

    Zurich also has a new head coach since we last played them. ‘Bomber’ Bo Henriksen, formerly head coach of FC Midtjylland and previously a striker for Kidderminster Harriers, has replaced Franco Foda, who got the heave-ho with FC Zurich sitting bottom of the Swiss League with six defeats, four draws and no win from their first ten games. Henriksen picked up his first league win, 1-0 away to FC Sion, last weekend, and his first EL win against Bodø/Glimt the previous Thursday.

  9. 9
    ClockEndRider says:

    Excellent preview, Trev. I have decided to seek counselling to help recover from the Opporknockety gag.
    Marquinhos played for the 21s the other night. I only watched the first half and he looked fine without pulling up any trees.

  10. 10
    Ollie says:

    Cheese Trev! Enjoyable preview as ever. Let’s face it, beating Zurich should not be a mountain to climb.
    3-0 to the Arsenal.

  11. 11
    bathgooner says:

    Top grade preview, Trev. I expect another starting XI made up of back-ups and first teamers who hopefully get a rest for the last 30 while the back-ups and some youth prospects see the game out. If only things always work out as planned! We ought to, and need to win this one. Just do it, Arsenal.

  12. 12
    Countryman100 says:

    Cheers Trev. Another excellent preview, with a chuckle a line. We can see the end of this long run of games now we are in November, to the relief of players and bloggers alike. I have no idea what sort of team we will see, but doubt Arteta wants to risk those two extra games in February. So I think he’ll start strong and rotate if and when we get a grip of the game. But I’ve seen suggestions that we should “bin off” the EL or the League Cup, or the FA Cup. Not for me. I still think it’s a long shot for the league and would be thrilled with a strong second or third place. But I always want us to win every competition we are in. That does not mean playing the same XI every game. It means making sensible use of the squad where we have strong alternatives at several positions, especially with Elneny and and Zinchenko returning and the reemergence of Reiss Nelson. Making lots of changes at once (rotate the shit out of it as Arseblog says) disturbs the team. After these four games get ESR fit and make buys in January to ensure we have strong alternatives in every position. Brighton will be another interesting team selection, and will depend how the team come out of the crucial Chelsea game on Sunday.

    Enjoy your curry TTG. I’ve recently discovered a small and unassuming Greek restaurant on Holloway Road where the welcome is warm and the food is excellent. Chicken shish or lamb chops tonight I think, plus some good Greek red wine.

    COYG

  13. 13
    North Bank Ned says:

    Henriksen has ditched Zurich’s 4-3-3 for 3-4-1-2, so we’ll probably have a frustrating first half trying to break down a back five unless we can get an early goal.

    C100@12: Enjoy.

    This Guardian column is worth a read: https://www.theguardian.com/football/2022/nov/03/qatar-calling-its-critics-racist-opens-a-debate-that-may-be-worth-having-world-cup

  14. 14
    Trev says:

    Cheers all ! Pleased if it gave you a chuckle.

    Thanks to Ned for filling in the blanks around the Zurich squad – in all seriousness it shouldn’t matter a great deal who they have in or out, their form is terrible.

    On matters Swiss, I went for my first yodelling lesson at the weekend. The girl on reception said “if you’re here for the yodelling lesson please form an orderly orderly queue.”

    😉

  15. 15
    Ollie says:

    Heh Trev. Add another chuckle to the previous chuckles with your yodelling joke. 😀

  16. 16
    Ollie says:

    Thanks for the article, Ned. Excellent and fair points there.

  17. 17
    ClockEndRider says:

    Trev @14.
    The noise you can hear is the sirens of the Bad Joke Police coming for you…….

  18. 18
    Trev says:

    They haven’t got me yet ……..

  19. 19
    Las says:

    Cheers Trev! Puntastic as ever however, I understand CER concern @17.
    Anyway, I hope that the Reissue family will turn up in greater number tonight. I’m expecting Reissue MoNeny and Reissue Zinchenko playing their part.
    COYG!

  20. 20
    Trev says:

    C100, chicken shish? Thank heavens for autocorrect 😉

  21. 21
    Esso says:

    Ramsdake, White, Holding, Gabriel, Tierney, Elneny, Lokonga, Vieira, Nelson, Jesus, Nketiah

    Subs: Hein, Hillson, Partey, Saka, Ödegaard, Martinelli, Saliba, Cedric, Tomiyasu, Marquinhos, Zinchenko, Smith

  22. 22
    Gunnersaurus Stunt Double says:

    Bit of a disjointed first half from us, but we are miles better than this lot and it has been enough to get ahead and create some other good chances.

    Eddie and Jesus could both do with a goal.

  23. 23
    OsakaMatt says:

    1-0 half-time and a nice goal from KT. PSV winning as well last I looked so an early goal or two second half a la Forest would be handy. Nice to see Mo back and Zin on the bench.

  24. 24
    OsakaMatt says:

    Dunno about in the stadium but that was all a bit tenser than I wanted from my settee.
    Anyway, job done on a nice finish from KT.

  25. 25
    Gunnersaurus Stunt Double says:

    The entire group stage was tedious and shite. It provided very little entertainment or excitement, and we won 5 out of 6 games. I’m thrilled ot is over, and that we won it. Although, right now, I’m just mainly glad it’s over.

    I spent last year wishing we were back in Europe. What a thing to ask for.

  26. 26
    North Bank Ned says:

    GSD@25: Potentially nights against Barca, Juve and Ajax to come. It is almost like being in the CL. 🙂

    I was unable to watch the match, but it seems to have been a repeat of the lesson from the Marseilles and Southampton games: first-half domination means diddly squat if you don’t score.

  27. 27
    Ollie says:

    Ned at 26. Thankfully we just avoided playing any of these in February though.
    The end of the match was really painful to watch.

  28. 28
    scruzgooner says:

    >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>