Goonerholics Forever

Given the paucity of options brought about by having 3 first choice forwards unavailable along with the Pyramid’s Pirlo, Tierney and Odegaard off games with a note from matron and ESR still being nursed back following injury, the pre-match discussions around what team to put out were rendered pretty much null and void.  Perhaps Arteta considered playing Tomi and Holding from the start but that’s really the extent of the changes which could have been made against a team representing a club like Sporting, while still keeping an eye on the need to rotate ahead of a far more important Premier League game less than 3 days later.  So, in came Turner in goal, Kiwior for Big Gabby with a midfield of Jorginho, Xhaka and Vieira with Nelson and Saka wide and Martinelli leading the line.

Rather oddly, the ground seemed to be half empty, not just at the start but right through. Which made the awarding of slightly less than 3,000 tickets to Arsenal fans even more curious. If anyone has any insight on that, I’d be grateful to learn the reasoning.

The game started with the disappointing news that Hector Bellerin, once of this parish, was missing with a knee injury.  Perhaps he’ll be fit for the second leg.  We started promisingly with good control and possession while not really creating too much.  The opposition seemed content to get players behind the ball and try to catch us on the break, a ploy which has been our downfall in European competitions in the past. And in Marcus Edwards – lest we forget, a Spurs product – they had a player well able to hurt us. In the 21^st minute, Saka and the lively Vieira combined down the right to win us a corner. From the corner taken by Vieira a curiously free Saliba netted with a delicious glancing header from inside the 6 yard box.  The tv then showed a clear foul by Zinchenko on one of their players who was being held in the manner of a WWE wrestler, I thought.  The ball was never going to arrive behind Saliba into the vicinity of the Lisbon player, however it was still a foul. I would have been unhappy if it hadn’t been disallowed if it had happened at the other end. The referee, fortunately, did not concur. 

Sporting 0 Arsenal 1

Going behind seemed to kick Sporting up a gear or two and they began to take more possession and create rather more threat. In the 33^rd minute, Inacio shot from 30 yards out and Turner made a good save, parrying the low shot out for a corner. From the corner, taken, inevitably, by the aforementioned Edwards, Sporting scored an identical goal to ours, again, with nobody seeming to take ownership of Inacio who was able to nod in from inside the 6-yard box.  Further inspection by the commentary team showed that new boy Kiwior looked to be shaping to jump but then suddenly ducked, as if he had heard a shout, presumably from the keeper.  It was all the more odd considering that the keeper looked as if he had started to come for the cross and then backed away. Questions will be asked this morning at London Colney, if they weren’t on the flight home.

Sporting 1 Arsenal 1

Sporting now had their tails up and in the 39^th minute, Edwards, again, hit a scorching shot from outside the box which required a very good save again from Turner, as the ball bounced just in front of him low down to his left, and he managed to turn it out for a corner. Just before half time, a deep corner from the left found White at the back post, whose header was gathered up awkwardly right on the line by the keeper.  Martinelli was booked for impeding the keeper in the ensuing scramble which seemed harsh.

Half-Time: Sporting 1  Arsenal 1

Arsenal started the livelier again in the second half and in the 48^th minute Zinchenko, in the inside left position, played a smart through ball into the box for an unmarked Martinelli to attempt a dink over the onrushing keeper, who saved well. Actually, the smarter thing to do would have been to square it to Vieira, unmarked on the penalty spot to roll in.  Then on 55, an equally smart dinked pass, Edwards again, into the box led to a shot requiring a reaction save from Turner. Unfortunately the keeper could only parry it out to the oncoming Paulinho to tap in from 5 yards,.  Disappointing, as for the first 10 minutes of the half Arsenal had been well in control. 

Sporting 2  Arsenal 1

In the 59^th minute the effervescent Martinelli was fed the ball just inside our half and set off on a run, evoking memories of that night at the bus stop in Fulham from a few seasons back. He beat 3 players and then raced through on goal, knocked it past the keeper and then, the hard work seemingly done, he took a poor touch when he might simply have knocked it in with his favoured right and a defender did very well indeed to get back to put it out for a corner.  Frustrating and exciting in equal measure.

It was now rather more open as Arsenal sought to press forward and a minute or so after Martinelli’s miss, Sporting really ought to have taken the lead as we were caught square at the back and Paulinho ran through but managed only to put the ball high, wide, and not terribly handsome. Phew! Straight after this, it was our turn. Saka won the ball in midfield, fairly, despite the complaints from the opposition, and squared to Xhaka who arrowed home a 35 yard rasper into the bottom right corner on 62.  Ok, actually his attempted slide rule pass into Martinelli came off the luckless Sporting defender and caught the keeper off balance as it squirmed into the net.  Imagine if you will, a considerable proportion of a certain F. Lampard’s goals for the denizens of the bus stop.  That’s how much of a deflection it took.

Sporting 2  Arsenal 2

Arsenal began to exert more control as the game wore on as subs were brought on – Partey, ESR, Tomi all adding notably. By the end, the Sporting press, which really was very good at times, had faded considerably and perhaps the fact that they don’t play in such a competitive league as the Premiership, with all its physical requirements, was showing more than a little. 

I think Sporting were happy to go away with the draw.

Full Time: Sporting 2  Arsenal 2

In the final analysis, we take the opposition back to the Emirates without 2 of their first choice defenders, even if one of them wasn’t good enough for the Premiership. For our part, it was a good performance from Vieira who at times was asked to be the back-to-goal centre forward and showed considerable improvement in terms of physical presence. It was minutes for Kiwior, bringing him into the team and improving his understanding of what is required not least in terms of communication with the goalkeeper. Perhaps on the part of Turner, for whom simply being at Arsenal represents a significant step up in terms of the required level, it was a lesson from which he will learn.  If the performance and result were offered to me ahead of the game, it’s a Hobson’s choice I would happily have accepted.

Welbeck vs Leicester. Arshavin vs Barcelona. Over the last 16 years or so, iconic moments at the Emirates have been fairly hard to come by. We are yet to win a league title in our no longer new abode. We have not competed in the Champions League for six successive seasons. Until fairly recently you would hear grumbles from fans older than myself about how the Emirates would never be able to recapture the homely feeling of Highbury. Perhaps one reason for that is the lack of truly iconic moments. Was what we saw in this game an iconic moment? What even is the criterion for a goal or a game to be considered iconic? Does the level of opposition play a role in that? Bournemouth are certainly lowlier opponents than Leicester with whom we were jostling for the title at the time. And they are absolutely no Barcelona. But perhaps what truly defines a moment as iconic is not the event itself but the events that unfold after. In these previous instances we would go on to collapse in the title race and eventually finished ten points behind Leicester. And we went on to lose the second leg in Barcelona, albeit after some harsh refereeing decisions. They don’t sound as iconic now, do they? Or maybe I am simply being cynical and we should just enjoy living in the moment rather than worrying or speculating on what might occur later on.

In terms of the game itself, well it was a roller coaster of emotions. And that’s putting it mildly. Arteta unusually made three changes to the side which thumped Everton less than 72 hours previously. Out went White, Jorginho and Xhaka, in came Tomiyasu, Partey and Vieira. A very attacking line up. Perhaps too attacking, as no sooner had the game kicked off than we found ourselves behind. The away side moved the ball out to the right-hand side, a cross was swung in, Gabriel took a swipe and missed it and the ball found its way to Phillip Billing who scrambled it home past Ramsdale to give Bournemouth a shock lead. My first initial thought was whether it was the fastest Premier League goal ever? We later found out it was in fact the second fastest goal,  coming in nine seconds! The fastest was Shane Long after seven seconds for Southampton against Watford in 2019, if anyone was interested. Fair play to our visitors because it was clearly a kick off routine they had worked on and it had paid dividends. 0-1

The crowd did their very best to urge the team on to get a quick response and we nearly got it. Partey won the ball back in midfield and fed Ødegaard who drove into the edge of the box and saw his effort well saved by Neto. Saka then followed in but again Neto was there to block. The rest of the half was attack vs defence. However, Bournemouth remained a threat on the counter. They very nearly made it 2 on the half hour mark. Solanke played in the goal scorer, Billing, whose pass was out of reach for Solanke but it found Outtara who really ought to have scored. However, his effort was superbly blocked by Ramsdale. We then had a handball shout but there was nothing doing. An incredibly frustrating half of football. 

The second half began with Arteta making a change. Off came Tomiyasu who has looked off it in recent weeks. On came Benjamin White. We kicked off and continued to dominate possession but remarkably it was Bournemouth who found a second. A corner was whipped in, their one and only corner of the game, but they made it count as Senesi got away from Partey and nodded in to send the away fans into ecstasy. 0-2

They couldn’t believe what they were seeing, and neither could the near sixty thousand Arsenal fans. But they continued to be raucous in support of their side. There was still over half an hour to go. And just five minutes later we had a goal back. Ødegaard whipped in a corner which was half punched away by Neto. The ball was headed back into a dangerous area by Émile Smith Rowe who had come on in the first half for the injured Leandro Trossard and Thomas Partey was there to atone for his previous error to prod home! 1-2

Now the momentum was well and truly with the league leaders. Smith Rowe was replaced by Reiss Nelson. There was some concern of injury but that was quashed by Arteta later on as the plan was for him to get around half an hour. Of course, his introduction to the game was earlier than anticipated due to the Trossard injury. And the man from the Elephant and Castle made an immediate impact. Partey swatted aside a shoal of Bournemouth players like an octopus on steroids and fed Reiss Nelson who swung in a delicious cross on his weak foot which was met by Ben White to volley the ball over the line, despite Neto’s best efforts to prevent it crossing the line. But all eyes turned to the referee whose watch vibrated or pinged. “I’ve got a text” he screeched like an orange Love Island contestant and the text read “GOAL”. 2-2 

The noise inside the ground was now reaching deafening levels; We had at least three penalty claims waved away by VAR. Martinelli fired narrowly over after being sent through on goal. The clock ticked over into six minutes of injury time. I should mention that Neto was timewasting at every goal kick and I lost count of the amount of times a Bournemouth player went down feigning injury. In truth, it ought to have been more than six minutes. I’m not even certain the ball was in play for that long. In fact, the first minute of stoppage time was eaten up by a Bournemouth defender lying on his deathbed. Miraculously, he survived. But that timewasting would come back to bite our seaside friends from the South coast.

Into the 7th minute of added time, we had yet another corner which was headed away but only as far as Riess Nelson who chested the ball down and lashed it in with his left foot on the half volley. 3-2

Cue utter pandemonium and chaos. The Arsenal substitutes and many members of staff invaded the pitch in celebration in pure elation, joy, and relief. Arteta punched the air and ran down the touchline in ecstasy. There were grown men in the North Bank in tears. The emotion of it all was too much for some. A few people had left the stadium having resigned themselves to a disappointing draw. They tried to get back in. It was just complete chaos. Talk about a shift in emotions. How important could that goal be on 28^th May? Only time will tell but for now it was celebration time in North London. Well, the red half anyway.

And for Reiss Nelson of all people to get the goal. Once upon a time he was the Golden Boy of the Hale End golden generation. He has since been put into the back of the picture due to the emergence of Bukayo Saka and Emile Smith Rowe. He spent last season on loan at Feyenoord and he seems to have done a lot of growing up. In the past he had talked about not taking his career as seriously as he should but he appears to have taken it up several gears this season. He is yet to start in the league this season. He has played just 85 minutes all year. But my goodness, has he made the most of those minutes! That’s three goals and two assists in his very limited game time now. His contract is up in the summer. Much like Eddie last year, he is at a crossroads in his Arsenal career. He is playing for a new contract right now and at the minute he is earning it. If he keeps this up there’s no reason why he shouldn’t get a new deal. Expect him to start on Thursday. 

The party continued as the Arsenal fans sauntered down Holloway Road, Blackstock Road and the Seven Sisters. The Emirates has never seen scenes like this. It has never seen atmospheres like this. This was not a North London Derby. This was not a big clash with a big six rival. This was a category C game against a newly promoted Bournemouth. But this is how it is every week now. Perhaps for the first time since we moved into our State-of-the-Art arena in 2006, it is beginning to feel like home.

But back to my original point regarding iconic moments. This really did feel like one. I’ve never seen the Emirates celebrate a goal like that. Not on that scale. This is just the latest in a series of late winners we have enjoyed since the World cup. For those that say this is unsustainable, well, we are winning games in all sorts of different ways it seems. On Wednesday night we swatted aside Everton with ease. This one was nowhere near as straightforward. But it was certainly more satisfying. Something very special is brewing at this great football club. And we are very lucky to be witnessing it. We are going places. Whichever way this season ends, we will be talking about it for years to come. It’s been a season of drama. Perhaps some would call it iconic? Only time will tell. It is up to us now how this game ends up getting defined in the history books. Another “where did it all go wrong?” moment? Or yet another game where we proved our eventual champions credentials? I cannot wait to find out how this tale unfolds….

Lightning could not strike twice for Sean Dyche’s Everton side despite a stubborn and hardworking opening forty minutes. From the moment that the rapier sharp Bukayo Saka smashed a right-footed shot over his England goalkeeper Jordan Pickford the result of this one was, in true Arsenal fashion, never in doubt.

Everton did well for most of the first half, and we were not at our incisive best, the final ball being somewhat lacking from us, and the Toffees even managed a couple of shots on target before we got our first. They were everything Baff told us they would be in his perfectly-judged preview (note: as I type this, Sheffield Utd have just knocked the spuds out of the FA Cup – hahahahaha!)

I haven’t got it in me to do anything other than doff my cap to Dyche and his ability to turn a team playing without confidence or purpose into one that looked solid, organised and a decent outift. They were physical, but they didn’t take the piss like some have, although I could do without a unit like Onana (what’s his name?) falling on the floor and getting play stopped for a head injury every time anyone disturbed his aura.

The first half was intriguing, despite a lack of goal-mouth action. We saw some lovely fluidity from our front four with Trossard and Ødegaard getting out to the wings, allowing Saka and Gabigol to head central, albeit nothing came of any of it. Jorginho and Zinchenko provided the midfield platform, spraying the ball about, whilst Xhaka drifted around and occupied pockets of space. We were patient and it was all pretty good – except we had no end product.

Until, suddenly, we did.

Fed up with making clever runs only to find two blokes marking him, Saka drifted into their box and donned his invisibility cloak. Of course, Oleksander Zinchenko has magic in his veins, so, unlike the Burnley Everton defenders, he could actually see our number 7 and duly threaded the ball through to him, where he stood unmarked. With his weaker foot he leathered the ball past the near post and into the roof of the net. The faithful went wild. The lad himself looked rather happy too.

Moments later we had another. Ødegaard’s level has been immense this season but this was absolutely outrageous and the boy was taking the mickey today. Five moves ahead of anyone else in the stadium, and sensing that Gueye could be lured into an error, our captain pretended to get the ball stuck under his feet and fall over. To any but the most observant eye it looked like he had done just that, and Gueye took the bait hook, line and sinker as he ambled in and poached the ball. However, like some sort of Premier League Derren Brown, the Norwegian maestro had confused him into dawdling on it like he was Pickford taking a goal kick, and his brain froze as he did nothing and still nothing and a bit more nothing until Saka nicked the ball off him and Martinelli swept it home.

The lino immediately ruled it out for offside, but we had time for a quick round of VAR Pot Luck, and it turned out that we had the winning ticket on this occasion. Frankly, I’ve got no idea what decision they are gonna make even after I’ve seen the freeze-frames, but I liked the one today. More of those please.

We brought on Partey at half-time. I’ve been really impressed with Jorginho every time he has played and his signing looks to me like a very canny piece of business, but it isn’t fair to a single player in this squad (or league) to ask them to do what Partey does, because he is simply the business. That bloke is just one hell of a player. He does the job of two people, a bone fide monster.

Also, while I’m at it, Ben White looked so good today. No goals or assists, and he wasn’t up against much from an offensive perspective (“Neal Maupay… The prosecution rests, my lord.”) but he looked consummately in control.

As the half wore on, we turned the screw, ratcheting up the pressure, which told in the 70^th minute when our captain made the most of a lovely cross from the dangerous Trossard, who had been left in far too much space on the left wing, to side foot a right-footed shot home for our third.

By this point we were purring, an absolute Rolls Royce performance. The excellent crowd gave us a few oles, which I’m no fan of, but hey, they’ve earned the right with the support they have shown this season, which has been as phenomenal as the team.

We really could have had more. Trossard and Gabi could have scored, before Xhaka and Leo were replaced by Vieira and Eddie, who both could have scored too.

Nketiah did grab an assist, after making a nice run into the inside left channel and squaring for our young Brazilian tyro to boost his excellent numbers further as he nipped in front of the defender and slotted a finish through the keeper’s legs. Timewaste that, Jordan.

All you need is to add some punctuation and ‘Timewaste’ is an anagram of ‘See? I’m twat!’

I’m just saying, Jordan. Just saying.

Zinchenko and Ødegaard went off, job done. KT3 came on for the Ukrainian and decided that his way of playing left-back is much better than the way the Scot has been doing it all these years. He promptly took up a position in the centre circle and showed repeatedly for the immaculate Gabriel and Saliba, who for some reason seemed less inclined to give him the ball in that area than they do Zinchenko, and funnelled it out wide, much to Tierney’s chagrin.

I am not a composer, and I can’t play the bagpipes, but if we don’t win the league this year then I’ll have to spend some time brushing up my skills and coming up with a pibroch to lament the occasion, because “Tierney’s Chagrin” is too good a title to waste. Or, failing that, I’ll invent a cocktail. I may be on safer ground here. Maybe a single malt mixed with Baileys? That’s enough to make any reasonable person cry.

I was chuffed to see our captain replaced by our number 10. I love ESR, and although he will need a few more cameos, and perhaps some Europa League game time, to get fully up to speed, he is a player whose goals and guile will be vital before this season is over. Welcome back into the fold young man.

Michael Oliver let Everton off the hook with a mere two minutes of injury time and then blew up a few seconds early anyway, the crowd roaring at a job well done as the final whistle sounded.

We are five points clear at the top the league, and our goal difference also got a boost. We played well and have three out of our next four league games coming up at The New Home Of Football.

Game by game. Step by step. That’s what got us this far, and it’s a great place to be…

But how much further can we go?

Until next time, have a good one ‘holics.